Today Evyn cried and told her therapist that she hated her brother and if she had a choice she would have him run over by a car. When asked why she hated him so much (besides the obvious) she said it was because I had money to spend on his doctors and medicine but I would not buy her a $1,300 parrot. It was unfair, Nicky's gets everything, therapists love him, he has friends at school, he get's mom's time and mom's money. Everything is for Nicky. It's not true but I sure understand why it looks that way to her.
She cried and got angry as she told us that she didn't have any friends at school. She explained that she needed the parrot because the only ones really there for her were her dog and her Skink (that's a lizard) and if she had a parrot she would have enough friends.
I offered to sit with her and work out a plan for her to get a parrot. I promised to compromise and work with her if she would work with me. I also talked about the parrot being a solution to a problem, not enough mom time, and we needed to resolve that problem. I asked her to share with me what she would want mom to do with her and for her, because I heard her saying that what I was doing was not necessarily what she wanted. She refused to do either.
The good news is, she is talking about her feelings and maybe letting it out will help a little. The sad news is at 14 this is her reality and she is hurting and buying a parrot won't make it better.
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