Coping & Growing - Eight Years into My Autism Journey

I’m just coming off a rough four weeks with Nicky.

When I’m in the mist of the storm the best I can do is hold on tight, deal with what comes and wait for the things to settle down. After each storm, I slowly loosen my clinched fists, tight jaw and reflection follows.

Today reflection hit, and I found myself knowing that we learn the most when faced with adversity, not when things are going great. So from that perspective “not great” is still good.

Eight years into my Autism Journey I can look back and know what no one could have told me. The intense physical, financial and emotional challenges of; running a business, divorcing my husband of 17 years, caring for my children, being a single mom, coping every day with autism and it’s impact on every member of our family have been exactly the experiences I was meant to have, to become the person I am today.

Today as I sat at lunch with a wonderful woman (who I met as a part of my autism advocacy) I thought of my gifts. I thought about how if any events in my life, up to this moment had not happened, I would not be the women I am today. I would not be a bad person and most likely I would have had an okay life. But, not this life which really has made me happier, a better mom, a better friend, more aware of myself, able to care for myself, genuinely empathic of others, less judgmental, kinder, more accepting and more grateful for everything!!!!!

I compare myself to a box of crayons…I used to be a very nice 12 color box and now I’m a brighter, prettier 36 color box. If I keep up this pace I’ll be a spectacular 100 colors before my time is done.