Wednesday, June 5, 2013

If You Judge People You Have No Time to Love Them...Mother Teresa

I just learned a teen I've known for a few years, who has ASD, will be leaving his family home and going to live in a group home and I felt an instant and profound sadness. My eyes started to well up and then I asked myself   "Why am I so upset? What I am hearing?".  Then I realized all I could hear was "The family gave up. They couldn't do it anymore and they gave up".  

As soon as I recognized it, I also knew it wasn't true. I don't know their story!, I don't know their life, their family.  For all I know this could be the best possible thing for him, yet that's not where my mind when.  It was quite the revelation that my response was not to ask "Why?" or why my  first thought was were not how painful it must be for the parents, or if the teen had asked for an opportunity to be independent. 

Clearly my reaction was all about me, my fears and my judgement and had nothing to do with the family. Oh, to be a work in progress!