My mom sent me this and I had to share! Well, we do not age that much. It is that one more year is about to be over and a new bright, wonderful, healthy and wealthy year 2015 is upon us. Keep the 2014 good memories, and start the New Year with good sense and good humor.
- Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes and come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller.
- Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet.
- I don't trip over things, I do random gravity checks.
- I don't need anger management. I need people to stop driving me nuts!
- Old age is coming at a really bad time.
- When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment ... now, as a grown up, it just feels like a small vacation.
- The biggest lie I tell myself is ..."I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."
- Lord grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the friends to post my bail when I finally snap.
- I don't have gray hair. I have "wisdom highlights." I'm just very wise.
- My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance to idiots that needs work.
- I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I'll do that second week.
- Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... but it can muffle the sound!
- Why do I have to press one for English when you're just gonna transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
- Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.
- Oops! Did I roll my eyes out loud?
Have a wonderful new year 2015, enjoy life, be safe, be healthy, make happiness your best friend.