A day in the life of a single mom raising a teenager and a child with autism. I believe that it's not what we receive, but what we give away that defines us. I want to give away all that I have learned and experienced in hopes that it will help families raising a child with autism or any disability. This is my candid journal where I open up my world and share my joys, knowledge, lessons, disappointments, challenges, frustrations, fears and successes - one day at a time.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
What Will Happen When I'm Gone?
I think the thing that worries me the most is what will happen to Nicky when I'm not here. Last night was one of those nights where I started thinking about it. I imagined what his life could be like if no one is here to protect him and the images left me bent over, feeling sick and sobbing. It was so bad I just made myself stop. I told myself, to push it out of my mind, because right now I am here. I'm healthy and lord knows there's enough to think about that is happening right now! So I stop myself by repeating that over and over. I even made myself laugh by envisioning a funny scene of he and I living together in an assisted living complex sharing care givers, but I know there's nothing funny about it.
Will anybody care for him when I'm gone? What will our country do for all the adults living with autism? I pray we will do the right thing. But I don't know.