Tuesday, June 19, 2012

When Your ASD Teenager Goes "Alpha" on You...It's Time to Set Boundaries

When Your ASD Teen Goes "Alpha" on You... It's Time to Set Firm Boundaries. 


Oh, no you don't!!!  That was my reaction when Nicky tried to go Alpha on me! 

There's something frightening that happens when your son, now in puberty, suddenly taller and stronger than you are steps right up to you and presents a physical challenge by telling you "No!".

In that moment gut instinct - unlike my usual protective mama bear -  snapped into full force and I went toe to toe with my boy. Nicky said "No" and I said "Oh... NO YOU DON'T" in a way only a mom can say. Standing face to face, chest to chest I made it perfectly clear that no matter how old or big he gets, I'm in charge around here! You will not take on the Mama!. 

It was a big shift inside me. A shift I didn't expect. With Nicky in my face,  I was instantly consumed with the knowledge that if I let this pass, if I gave him permission to dominate me, I would regret it.  I knew at that moment the worst thing I could do for our relationship would be to let him know he could scare or dominate me. 

Quite a success story for a mom who struggled when it came to using a firm voice on her baby. It was a good moment...for both of us. 

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